Thomas Dean {4 Months + Contact Update}

I have a lot of exciting updates to cover today but first I need to mention something that's been really heavy on my heart. For those of you who have been reading along for the past year will remember the devastating SIDS incident we went through with Caroline in September 2014. If you're new, you can catch up here. To be completely honest, I have a lot of PTSD related to that night and reluctantly replay that nightmare often in my head and even let the what ifs creep in from time to time. I honestly cannot fathom what this past year would have been like without our little Caroline. The joy she's brought us is indescribable. She had just turned four months old a few days before the incident occurred and as Thomas approached his four month birthday (and the days that have followed) I have been a paranoid mess. So mamas, please, please tuck your babies into bed with a SIDS monitor during their first year. Nobody ever thinks this would happen to them. 

Okay, sorry to kick off this update on a depressing note. In happier news, Thomas is doing better than ever. Since my last update, Thomas quickly and completely healed from his second successful cataract removal surgery! (Side note: A crazy coincidence...during our stay at the hospital Thomas' doctor was the same doctor who took care of Caroline during her SIDS incident!!!) We also began the wild and crazy contacts journey. Each week we have to visit the ophthalmologist to try a new set of contacts until we get the best fit. This has been extremely frustrating because each new set takes about a week to arrive since they are custom made based off of the measurements the doctor takes. So we've been through many sets of contacts that didn't fit over his pupil and with each failed experiment we've been out of pocket for worthless contacts and worse, we've lost a week of opportunity to make progress on Thomas' vision. To add to the frustration, our insurance isn't covering any of our weekly doctors visits, contact fittings during each visit or the actual contacts which are several hundred dollars per contact.

Anyway, we finally had our appointment at Duke Medical Center that we've anxiously been waiting for and it was a huge blessing and worth every penny. First, we loved our doctor who actually specializes in...INFANT CONTACTS! Not only did she have several sets of contacts ready to try out, she showed us how to remove them in seconds and without touching his eye!!!! To give you a little history, for the past 5 weeks leading up to this appointment we've uncomfortably watched the "contact lady" at our ophthalmologists office remove his contacts by digging around with her long fingernails, trying to pinch it out while Thomas uncontrollably screams. Then, it takes her no less than an hour to put the new set in. These weekly doctor visits were taking hours each Friday morning. So you can imagine our surprise (and relief) at our Duke appointment when our doctor literally popped his contacts out. She also did an extensive eye test and was happy to report she had the exact size contact on hand for Thomas that he needed! Hooray! She showed us how to slide in each contact (in just a few seconds!!!) and afterwards Thomas was grinning from ear to ear. But wait, it gets better! She did a lot of exercises with Thomas to test his vision and said she was really happy with how he was responding. 

Since our Duke visit last week we've seen a tremendous improvement in Thomas' eye contact, he is actually grabbing for toys now, he's smiling more than ever, he's following us more when we're in the same room and Matt and I are removing, cleaning and replacing his contacts ourselves now! We know that he is gaining vision back and although it may not be perfect and we still have a long road ahead, we are truly thankful for the miracles the Lord has worked in Thomas so far. It's hard to believe that just two months ago we were told "your baby is blind and we don't know if he'll ever see" to where we are today. So grateful!

Other fun four month stuff...

Four Month Highlights:

• 13 pounds (6%); Height is 25" (37%); 40.5 cm head (14%)
• Has the cutest dimple in his right cheek.
• Has transitioned into daycare super great. Didn't have any issues at all from the first day like his, ahem, sister.
• Giggling when he's really worked up.
• Started rolling from back to belly and is an unstoppable little thing! Once he is firmly on his belly he gives us the biggest and happiest smile and everyone, including Caroline claps and cheers. These are some of my most treasured moments!
• Found his feet and loves to hold on to them and rock from side to side.
• Eating 6 ounces of Earths Best Formula every 3 hours during the day. Taking last bottle at 8 pm and sleeping in pack & play in our room until about 4 am (a bit of a sleep regression this month).
• Size 2 diapers.
• Still has issues pooping so we're going to skip rice cereal and oatmeal since it's loaded with iron and move straight to purees in about a month or so.
• Sleeping in our room still (our choice!) and loves being swaddled in the sleep sack.
• We asked the doctor about the flat spot on the back of the head and he wasn't concerned and said it was normal for his age. Phew. 
• Very drooly! 
• Spent two weeks at Grandmom's house while I recovered from surgery.
• Wearing contacts!    

Four month favorites: Fisher-Price Lights Piano / Winkel Rattle / Links Toy / Baby Einstein Tag Along Tunes / Activity Gym / JJ Cole Agility Carrier / Snuza Baby Movement Monitor / Mustela PhysiObebe No Rinse Cleanser / Dohm Sound Machine / Wubanub / Boppy Lounger / Aden & Anais Swaddle Blankets / Nose Frida / Bumbo Seat / Boogie Mist Saline Spray

Thomas & Caroline at four months old

The Glue that Keeps Our Family Together

With a baby in each arm, a lunch box, a briefcase, two diaper bags and a set of car keys, Matt hustled out of the house earlier than usual this morning so he could log a few extra hours into his already long work day. Moments before the door closed behind him he did two awesome things. First, he wrestled the kiddos into our bedroom so we could all exchange kisses (our rule is daddy and mommy always get the first kiss) and then told me I looked beautiful. Folks, I can assure you that these days I do not look anything close to "beautiful." I'm rocking 3 day old pajamas that have collected several coffee stains from awkwardly sipping coffee in a horizontal position in a sea of pillows, I've been "showering" with dry shampoo and baby wipes all week, I've opened my makeup drawer once since October 27 and I hadn't brushed my teeth yet.

After daycare drop off he swings through the coffee shop and brings me an extra large, piping hot cup of hazelnut coffee with the perfect amount of sugar and creamer. And honestly, none of this is a surprise to me because my husband is awesome. Like, really awesome, and does things like this for me all the time, not just when I'm a patient. So today he deserves to be bragged on because I often fail to recognize that I truly won the husband lottery. 

And before I dive into my public profession of love for my husband, I want to add a disclaimer that we've been through a lot over the years and things aren't always perfect. Marriage is hard. Then throw in two little ones and everything becomes even harder. And exhausting. I wouldn't trade our babies for the world, but sometimes I do reminisce back to the days before we were a mommy and daddy. We had more money. More time to give one another. And things were a lot less complicated. But that's a post for another day. I digress.

Recovering from a double mastectomy is similar in a lot of ways to recovering from labor. There's a flood of gross body fluids, lots of pads and bandages to change often, you need assistance getting out of bed and to the bathroom, there are tons of medications required to keep your pain under control and more. But the biggest and most important recovery difference is that with a double mastectomy you 100% loose the ability to use your arms for the first week. You are forced to completely depend on another person (in my case, my husband) to do all of those lovely tasks previously mentioned (and many more) for you. Matt took dang good care of me during both of my recoveries after the birth of our children. But this recovery has not only humbled me in all sorts of new ways, it has also reminded me of all the reasons why I married this man of mine.

I am so grateful for our moms for taking care of our kiddos, keeping our home clean and making sure we were all fed. But while mom was running around vacuuming, folding laundry and whipping up freezer meals, Matt was laying in bed next to me, worried about my pain, fluffing my pillows, placing pills in my mouth every two hours and lifting my straw to my lips. He slept less than I did (and I barely slept that first week) in fear that I may need something. Each time I needed to use the bathroom he cleared a path in the bed for me and carefully lifted me out of our bed, holding on to me as I very slowly walked to the toilet. Then he had the lovely job of pulling down my underwear, waiting forever for me to pee (thank you, catheter), wiped me and redressed me. And every few days when I mustered up enough energy to shower Matt was there. He's wrapped and unwrapped my bandages dozens of times, applied ointments to my nipples, emptied, measured and cleaned cups of my blood and tissue from my drains several times a day and more.

As if taking care of me wasn't already a full time job, Matt has been running off of fumes as he cares for Caroline and Thomas on his own. He's up with Thomas at 4 am to feed him six ounces and a few hours later he's swooping Caroline out of her crib and setting her down to a plate of waffles and Mickey Mouse while he scrambles to shower and dress himself for work. Halfway dressed, he rescues Caroline from trying to jump out of her hi chair, smearing just a smidge of syrup onto his suit pants in the process. Both kids are now screaming for attention yet one parent is still down so he's forced to power through a hectic morning of diaper changes, wash and make all of Thomas' bottles, pack daycare bags, dress himself and both kids and get out the door. But of course, one or both poop minutes before departure so there's another round of diaper (and sometimes another outfit) changes. At some point during all of this he makes sure to carefully organize a combinations of six medications into pill containers for every two hours while he's gone. He knows I may sleep through a dose so he then sets five reminders on my phone to tell me which medications to take and when. Finally ready to tackle the double daycare drop off, he sweetly comes into our bedroom for the aforementioned kisses, i love you's and goodbyes...only to return 30 minutes later with a cup of coffee before putting in a 10 hour work day.

In those eerily quiet moments in our home I am reminded that Matt is the glue that keeps our family together these days. He is a dedicated daddy, devoted husband and I'm so lucky to be the one to snuggle into his arms when he collapses into bed at the end of the day (after he's cleaned the dishes, bathed the kids, read books and tucked both babies into bed). I love this man with my whole heart.

Our 2015 Christmas Card {Minted Giveaway}!

I set a new record for ordering our Christmas cards this year. In preparation for my surgery, we got together with Allison for family pictures before normal families had even thought about visiting the pumpkin patch! But dressing up and capturing our family together is an annual tradition I just did not want to miss! One of my very favorite things to do while unpacking our holiday decor is to go back through our years together in Christmas cards. Each card has been so special to us. In 2011 we celebrated our first married Christmas, in 2012 we purchased our home, in 2013 we announced our first pregnancy, in 2014 Caroline stole the show and in 2015 we added another adorable little person to our card! 

I think it goes without saying that THIS is definitely my favorite Christmas card yet! My entire world in a 5x7 rectangle...

{front}

{back}

I owe my friend Lindsey for dolling me up, Allison for her incredible ability to capture our winning Christmas card photo in five minutes and Minted for the prettiest holiday cards and saving me so much time with free recipient addressing!

Want to see a few strong runner ups for this year's Christmas card?

I swear Caroline spends most of her day hugging and trying to pick up her baby brother. She is so obsessed with him and loves him to pieces, well, until he's sitting in her bumbo or looking at her books.

 Our sassy little munchkin...

Nothing says "shoot is over" like a toddler noticing the nearby ducks!

And I have some fun news! Minted has graciously offered to give one lucky reader a $75credit towards holiday cards! To enter, use the rafflecopter below. Good luck!

a Rafflecopter giveaway     Our Christmas cards through the years: 2014 Christmas Card 2013 Christmas Card 2012 Christmas Card 2011 Christmas Card